Tuesday, February 08, 2005

The Rundown

So, often the Professor and I sit around and discuss whether there are essential differences between the sexes, if there's some thing that is just so unique to either gender that it remains unknowable to the other gender. Most scholars are not essentialists. . . about anything. . .especially not about gender. But some, who are or know transsexuals wonder. If there's not something essential to your gender, how do you know when you're born into the wrong body? I think it's obvious that there are differences between men and women, just in terms of how our reproductive capacities affect us. But I get quickly irritated with the "men can't be nurses," "women can't fight on the front lines" crap, because it relies too heavily on sweeping generalizations that don't hold up in the specific. Even if most men are not as nurturing as women (and I don't believe that), some men make excellent nurses and should not be dissuaded from that line of work. And I would never want to be on the wrong end of The Shill's wrath and her in-laws' gun collection, because she's mean. But last night, as I was eating the Redheaded Kid's brownies* and watching the best movie I've seen all year, I was once again pondering the differences between the sexes. I was watching The Rundown starring Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson. When the Butcher and the Redheaded Kid came in from work, they both asked me what I was watching, I told them, and they both said, "Oh, it's okay." Just okay?! Holy Jesus, were we even watching the same movie? I was enthralled through the whole thing and they got distracted and started playing chess. I'm still flummoxed as to how this can be. Is it a gender thing? Is The Rundown the perfect action movie for chicks? Is it an age thing? Is it a wrestling fan thing? I can't explain it. It's strange to me. But here are all the ways in which The Rundown is awesome.
  1. The Rock. He's a fine man and a not-to-shabby actor. I mean, compared to Dolf Lundgren, he's practically Shakespearian.
  2. The bad guy seems like he's going to get away, but he dies.
  3. The Rock's character has some tragic backstory, but instead of spelling it out, they just assume the viewer is smart enough to get that it's there and affecting him.
  4. That other guy repeatedly gets the shit knocked out of him.
  5. The female lead is a rebel leader and, though they rescue her, I didn't for a second believe that she really needed rescuing just because she was a woman.
  6. Christopher Walken's pants continue their journey towards his armpits.
  7. There's a bagpipe.
  8. There's enough homosocial bonding, homoerotic subtext, and masculine anxiety to write a thesis on. Think of how the other guy wants the Rock to touch his penis and then how the Rock refuses to use the phallic guns because he doesn't want to hurt his loved ones, and how the other guy tells the Rock he loves him right before they head off into the sunset.

It's awesome and I love it and I recommend it to y'all.

*I should say that there's a possibility that the brownies lead me to love this movie, but I think they were just tasty brownies and not an alternative to stinking up the couch.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Maybe because I am old or maybe because I am still getting accustomed to not being on vacation any more I became confused and merged the Rundown (which I have not seen) in my mind with Walking Tall (which I have). I could not figure out how I missed Christopher Walken in the entire movie since he is generally quite memorable and I could not remember anything about anything that happened in #8. I am telling you this Aunt B, because I think you may find it funny.

I was very amused when I finally figured out my mistake. It was almost as amusing when, last night, I announced my speculation as to what the next major plot point would be in the TV show we were watching as it happened. "I bet what will happen next is...ohhh it is happening now. OK. Super."

Sharp as a damn tack - SuperGenius

2/08/2005 11:59:00 AM  
Blogger tls said...

Ohmigod! Not only does the Legal Eagle correctly surmise what will happen next on TV shows (do they teach you that in law school) BUT we watched The Rundown a week ago and after it was over, I said, I really enjoyed that. And LE said, "It was okay."

And god help me, I really like The Rock. He was great on Saturday Night Live. And he doesn't just act the pants off of Dolph, but Ah-nuld, Stallone and Vin Diesel and a dozen other meatheads.

2/09/2005 03:49:00 PM  
Blogger Aunt B said...

His wife is a vice-president at Merril Lynch. So, I think he's got some brains or else she's got herself some arm candy.

I asked my intern and he also thought that The Rundown was just okay. I really am starting to suspect that it's a gender thing, except that, except for you, I can't find any other women who've seen it.

2/09/2005 05:19:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh, no...I meant that I figured out what was happening after everyone else had figured it out. It was blatant hinting that I picked up on five mintues after the rest of the room. So I was sick the day they taught that in law school...that and the day they taught law. If the dog yeller/drug czar is reading this she will get my reference for sure.

I will have to get the rundown and perform my own gender opinion experiment on it.


2/10/2005 03:17:00 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home