Friday, June 03, 2005

Granite Falls

Let's talk frankly about Granite Falls, my default lunchtime restaraunt when I can't think of any place else to go. On the plus side:
  • They give you crayons.
  • The employees in charge of moving the water from the parking lot are trying to make the most of it.
  • Once, when I was meeting someone for lunch, I poked my head in and asked if they'd seen her and they said "no" so I went outside to wait for her. The lunch crowd came, as it always does, and she showed up 40 minutes late because she had some car problem. I went in to tell them we were here and, folks, you are not going to believe this, they sat us right then. They'd held a table for us, for 40 fucking minutes at lunch!!!!! God bless them.
  • Their food is good.
  • I once saw Brad Paisley there.
  • You can sit out on the patio and watch the world go by.
  • They water their plants by ice cube. Brilliant!

On the minus side:

  • They've gotten rid of the Patio burger and I just can't get over it. Sure, their regular burger is fine and they're one of the few places in town that will give you an honest to god medium rare burger. But I miss the Patio burger.

Why, Granite Falls, why did you get rid of the Patio burger? Can't you make just a few up for us loyal customers, let us come in and say some secret password like "The Ice is in the Plants" and you whoop one up for us?

Here, folks, for those of you who've never had one, is the Patio burger: a patty encrusted in pepper (and maybe some other spices--shit, the memory is fading), on a wheat or onion bun (I'd recommend the wheat), with a layer of onion, a layer of baby spinich, and a dollop of sour cream. It was fantastic.

Sure, it'd give me heartburn, but I didn't care. The interplay between the pepper and the onion and the spinich and the sour cream was unique and delicious.

So, I still eat at Granite Falls, but I'm always a little sad when I open up the menu and see that the Patio burger is not in its appointed place.


Blogger Sarah Bott said...

The pepper encrusted burger sounds good, and the onion, but the rest of it (especially the sour cream)---yech!

And why is it called "Patio" burger?

Holding the table for a regular customer--good, good, good.

Ice cubes to water the plants--brilliant!

6/03/2005 04:39:00 PM  
Blogger Aunt B said...

I'm not a big sour cream fan. In fact, the only time I've ever eaten it is on the Patio burger, but somehow it really worked.

I think it's called the patio because they have this awesome porch you can sit on and eat and I think they call that the patio and so the burger was named after it.

We're trying the ice thing right now. I think it's got to be great for plants that need to really dry out between watering, because it prevents the water from just running down the sides of the dirt and out the bottom.

If something goes terribly wrong, I'll let you know.

6/03/2005 05:39:00 PM  
Blogger melusina said...

Ah yes, Granite Falls. Another thing I miss about Nashville!

The food was great and the crayons gave you something to do while waiting for the food to come. And the people were ALWAYS friendly.

6/03/2005 08:18:00 PM  
Blogger PPB said...

oh, my, Pilgrim/Heretic was right. I do love your blog! So glad I dropped in.

6/03/2005 09:04:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Granite Falls. It was never the same after my bachelorette party started out there 15 years ago...

6/03/2005 10:28:00 PM  

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