8:45

Yes, America, my head hit the pillow at 8:45 last night and I didn't wake up until 6:15. It was marvelous. I love sleeping. Mrs. Wigglebottom, however, did not sleep very well because she's very unhappy about the bicycle in the kitchen. She spent much of last evening growling and eyeing it suspiciously and this morning she barked at it until I moved it a sufficient distance away from her food. I talked to the Butcher about maybe putting it up in his room, but he claims he's going to ride it around this evening. It's times like this when I think of my Australian readers, of which there are, I think, two. So, I think of the two of you and wonder: does this shit seem bizarre to you? And I hope you aren't taking the anecdotes of our stupid behavior as some kind of metaphor for how U.S. foreign policy works. Although, now that I think about it, maybe you should.