Parental Idiocy

Unfortunately my cousin's wedding is becoming the biggest source of drama in my life after the Butcher's vehicle woes. For some reason, the wedding festivities are now stretched out over three days and I've had to enter into tense negotiations with my father about what to do with the dog. My dad wants me to leave the dog with the Professor, who, as you may recall, he and my mother had been telling people was my life partner until I discovered it and we had a big fight about it when they were down here last. Considering how homophobic my parents are, I was shocked and surprised that they would be as okay as they were with the idea that the Professor and I were a couple, but now I see that it was just a manifestation of their dream to have one more woman in the world who could take care of the people in our family. Yes, apparently selfishness trumps hate, at least in my family. I wonder if this might be the basis for a successful public service campaign from PFLAG or some such group. Imagine a television spot where a cranky old guy struggles with some boxes. His son says, "Dad, let Dan and I help." The cranky old homophobe scowls, but looks at Dan, sees that he has two arms and a sturdy back, and acquiesces. Then there could be some slogan at the end like "If you're nice to your gay children, they might make their lovers do stuff for you."