***Me, Drudge, and Sullivan in a Menage a Trois
[Hmm. I hope I'm not neglected during that tryst...]
Drudge, via Sullivan, straight to me: "And so many of the people in the arena here, you know, were underprivileged anyway, so this --this is working very well for them."--Barbara Bush.
Oh the compassion of this family of compassionate conservatives! That's right. All of these people just lost their homes and many lost family members, but their lives in a fucking football stadium are better than they were in New Orleans, back when they had homes and non-dead family members.
If we have to have a moratorium on laying blame, can't we have a moratorium on the people in charge* saying dumb-ass things?
*Don't even start with me. If she's had two presidents in her vagina and is being interviewed on NPR about things, she's one of the people in charge. Maybe not directly in charge, but in the sphere of influence.
posted by Aunt B at 9/06/2005 07:28:00 AM
29 Comments:
BAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHA! Barbara Bush has had two presidents in her vagina! Is there anyone else in history who can say the same??
Well, Abigail Adams... and I wouldn't be surprised to find that Clinton and Bush pere shared mistresses, but that's just speculative on my part...
Does this qualify as our national "Let them eat cake" moment or what?!?
I really like the porch of Trent Lott comment, but this is a close second for my vote of "let them eat cake moment."
As much as I dislike her son, Barbara Bush scares me more. God, I'm almost afraid to write about her for fear that she'll send me a photo of her icy look that will kill me dead.
Yes, it is working well for them. Not in the short term, but in the long term. The endless cycle of nowhere to go and nothing to do except live in poverty and make little poor babies is being broken. Now with the help of the gubmint and charitable organizations, these people will be relocated somewhere that isn't a toilet, and be given assistance in finding housing and employment. People who are on the bottom rung have nowhere to go but up. This disaster provides them with the opportunity to build a life somwhere other than a town they couldn't escape if their lives depended on it.
The Password is pupmrjdb
"two presidents in her vagina" is worthy of wonkette. Now if you become obsessed with ass-fucking, you can be Nashville's wonkette!
assuming you're not already.
I just put me in a menage a trois with Andrew Sullivan and Matt Drudge. It doesn't get any more ass-fucking than that, does it?
Does Wonkette get to kick people's asses? I'd totally love to be a blogger by day, ass-kicker by night.
Speaking of... Sarcastro, do you do that little grave dance in real life where a girl might watch or is it only confined to online?
Anyway, though your heartlessness is appalling, your faith in humanity is cute--this belief that this time our social programs won't make things worse. I'm not sure one can be that optimistic about humanity and remain conservative. They'll probably kick you out of the right wing for going around spouting that kind of commie nonsense.
I can see hear in a shelter: "Let's face it, you poor black trash were on the bottom rung of society anyway, living in that toilet you call a city. Just see this as a God-given opportunity towards economic advancement! Good luck with that!"
You're right of course. Drudge and Sullivan have to know ass-fucking like nobody's business.
That should read "I can hear him in a shelter:"
While I was reading that I kept wondering "When did Barbara have another son who was president?". Then I had the predictable moment when I realized I was a dumbass.
Apparently I need a date more than Aunt B. I'm not even getting the innuendo any more.
W
I had read about this somewhere else, but once again, B, you have made me HOWL!
You are missing the point, B. The gov't programs that caused the miserable existence of these people isn't going to help them. But now they don't have the housing project to go back to. It is time to start their lives anew. Just like Tina Turner in Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome. She lived with abusive Ike, Armageddon came, she wound up in charge of Bartertown. It's the American (or in this case, Australian) Dream.
Benjamin Franklin had it right when he wrote, "[T]he best way of doing good to the poor, is not making them easy in poverty, but leading or driving them out of it." Government dependency makes poverty easy.
"What Hurricane Katrina exposed was the psychological consequences of the welfare state. What we consider "normal" behavior in an emergency is behavior that is normal for people who have values and take the responsibility to pursue and protect them. People with values respond to a disaster by fighting against it and doing whatever it takes to overcome the difficulties they face. They don't sit around and complain that the government hasn't taken care of them. And they don't use the chaos of a disaster as an opportunity to prey on their fellow men.
But what about criminals and welfare parasites? Do they worry about saving their houses and property? They don't, because they don't own anything. Do they worry about what is going to happen to their businesses or how they are going to make a living? They never worried about those things before. Do they worry about crime and looting? But living off of stolen wealth is a way of life for them.
People living in piles of their own trash, while petulantly complaining that other people aren't doing enough to take care of them and then shooting at those who come to rescue them—this is not just a description of the chaos at the Superdome. It is a perfect summary of the 40-year history of the welfare state and its public housing projects." --Robert Tracinski
All those flood victims we've been seeing - they're all welfare parasites living in piles of their own trash in the housing projects complaining that the government doesn't help them enough. Every damn one of them. Obviously they got what they deserve.
Aunt B, I hope to God you have stopped touching yourself over this dude. You ought to be leaning over the commode.
Okay.
Here's the thing.
What Barbara Bush said was ill-timed and ill-phrased. I still think it was at least one of the premier let-them-eat-cake moments because it minimized all the suffering of these people.
However, I DO think (and you all can shoot me) that maybe the silver lining from this whole experience is that some of the afflicted persons can wind up in a better situation. The pre-flood conditions in the Lower 9th Ward were infamous throughout the world--yes, the world--for their poverty. Now that the people are being relocated to different areas OUT OF NECESSITY and their homes are being rebuilt, perhaps some slight good will come of it.
I'm not kidding myself that they'll be better off. Many of them would rather have the grandmas and moms and dads and babies back that died in the hurricane and its aftermath. I know I'd rather have my family whole and happy than a better house and a pot of money. Nevertheless, I think we can all agree that this our chance to help these people achieve a better standard of living.
Now you can take me back out and shoot me.
Anon, couldn't she do both?
Thanks Kat. It sounds nicer when you say it, for some reason.
Hmm. No, I don't think I can both vomit and masturbate to the thought of you at the same time. It's like trying to sneeze with your eyes open. I don't think it's physically possible.
But give me a half an hour and I'll think of you breaking the bed and littering Tiny Cat Pants with Robert Fucking Tracinski and see how it goes.
More later...
Hmm. No, I don't think I can both vomit and masturbate to the thought of you at the same time.
This sounds like something from The Aristocrats
All right, for starters, what the fuck kind of rhetorical strategy is that? To gross me out with the thought of Tracinski up naked late at night googling himself and coming across Tiny Cat Pants? Well, consider me sufficiently sickened.
I was intentionally missing your point, as you're well-aware. But if deliberate obtusiveness is going to result in your littering my site with libertarian quotes, I'll stop.
Instead, I'll gladly give you something to argue with. One, you're intentionally conflating at least three groups of people--the people in the Astrodome, poor people from New Orleans, people who are on welfare and live in housing projects, and criminals. Clearly some of the people in the Astrodome were on welfare and some of them come from the projects. But some of them are just poor. Once you've taken a sufficiently large pool (the 20,000 people in the Superdome) and attributed to them all the most negative qualities of the fewest of them (nowhere to go, nothing to do, fucking, fucking, fucking), there's no way to argue with you because you can always point to your small, but sufficiently tainting group of individuals.
Two, you are a fucking optimist! Fresh starts. Where? In Houston? Then expect the people who came from public housing to get dumped right back into public housing nightmares. You and I both know that the most successful government-funded housing occurs when poor people, even desperately poor people, are integrated into mixed-income neighborhoods where people have houses with yards and parks for their kids to play in and schools not overrun by drugs and gangs. You and I also know that most middle-class people don't want to live near poor people. So, don't look for some libertarian utopia (is that a contradiction in terms?) to spring up in Houston.
Three, Tracinski? Please. That motherfucker is a shallow thinker. I paraphrase: "They are not like us. They don't have values like we do. They like to live in squalor. They don't mind crime. They prefer to have no jobs. In adversity, their true criminal natures emerge." He's practically plagiarizing Klan recruiting material from the 1920s. He's lucky that shit's probably all in the public domain by now or he'd have some lawsuits on his hands.
Do you really believe the deck is not stacked against poor people?
"If one wants slaves, then one is a fool if one educates them to be masters." That's old Fred and if you think that everybody who opens his house up every week or every day to someone fourteen rungs lower on the social ladder than him so that they can clean his toilets doesn't know that somewhere in the back of their minds, you are even more of a foolish optimist than I thought. Shit, look at the schools poor kids have to go to.
Tracinski isn't friends with one motherfucking poor person, I'd bet you a million dollars. When he says that there are folks "petulantly complaining that other people aren't doing enough to take care of them," I want to know who. Name me one person who has ever said to Tracinski that the government wasn't doing enough to take care of them. There is none. He doesn't know poor people. This is a strawman he creates so that he can feel justified in his disgust at poor people and so he doesn't have to feel bad about the poor people who died in New Orleans (especially since, if we take him at his word, he's literally saying that "people complained that the government wasn't helping them and then shot at their rescuers"--that is, he's saying that writing "help us" or "save us" on the roof of your house is petulant complaining. Oh, how uncouth, that these desperate people wanted the people in the helicopters to help them.)
Are there welfare frauds and criminals among poor people? Are there tax cheats and criminals among the wealthier classes? People are people. They do what they can do to get by and they do what they think they can get by with. Conflating the lower class with the criminal class is bullshit. You, who work with the state government most certainly know the vice and corruption at every level of humanity.
Libertarianism, I thought, relies on the belief that every person has the ability--if not the will--to succeed in the world and should do so without the government's help. Isn't that it? Rabid individualism with a capitalist foundation? If so, then what's with the "us" and "them" bullshit? If your worldview is sufficiently complex enough, why does it have to reduce anyone else to caricature?
You said it, B. Well said indeed.
With your permission (or maybe even without it), I'll be masturbating tonight to the thought of you. I dig smart, compassionate chicks. In my mind, you'll also have killer legs. Among other things.
Killer legs? Not so much. Big tits? I've got those. Curly, nice smelling hair? I've got that, too.
Just to give you a little fodder for this evening...
Ha. It'd be weird and awesome if all my readers occassionally masturbated to me.
Big tits were included among the "other things". So was a shaved pussy. Now THAT'S fodder, my friend.
What's masturbatory fodder for you?
Christ, the brains, compassion, and big tits aren't enough? I have to find the time to remove all my body hair, too? This being masturbation fodder is harder than I thought. You'd better switch back to Janine Garafalo or Drew Barrymore or Eleanor Roosevelt or whomever it is that other liberals picture.
For me, it's Jerry Orbach. If he can't get it done, I picture LL Cool J and Evan Seinfeld making out with each other and that does it.
Sign me up for Evan's wife.
Relax, B. If I don't keep up my Libertarian street cred, they will take away my Ayn Rand decoder ring.
Besides,reducing others to caricature is a real time saver.
Ah, Ms. Patrick. She is a hottie, indeed. That reminds me that I need to speak to the Professor's lovers about the quality of porn at Casa de la B.
When there's porn of Tera Patrick and her husband available, why am I watching shitty scratchy footage of ugle fake hermaphrodites?
Y'all get a decoder ring? Wow. We don't get a decoder ring. Though I guess they have to give you something since y'all never win any elections...
I crack myself up.
Losing elections is all part of our evil, secret plan. That's why we need the decoder rings.
Ah, it's starting to make sense. You work at keeping the liberals busy masturbating and vomiting and the Republicans distracted by their god, and then, while we're all focused on other things, you abscond with New Hampshire.
Ha, you didn't think I knew about the New Hampshire plot, did you?
Come on, you watch porn (apparently). You should know pubic hair is so out, so 70's. Do I need hair in my mouth? No, I do not.
Some Jesus-freak conservatives are trying the same thing in South Carolina, which begs the question, "Isn't South Carolina already run by Jesus freak conservatives?"
The problem with New Hampshire is that it is in New Hampshire. They do have the coolest liquor bunker/rest stop I have ever seen.
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