Saturday, March 11, 2006
Country Music The Best Hank Williams Jr. Song--"Family Tradition" The Best Country & Western Song sung by a person who can't quite pull it off--"I'm Going to Hire a Wino" by David Frizzell The Best Singer I'm Always Like "God damn, who is this? I love this song."--Don Williams The Best Annie Lennox impersonation--That "Black Horse & Cherry Tree" chick Rap Music The Best Good-For-Nothing Smile--David Banner Snack Foods The Best Snack Food in the Machine at Work--These new Hershey's Kissables. Have you had these? They seem like a Hershey's rip-off of the M&M, but they are pleasantly different than that. The milk chocolate inside is a little creamier, I think, than your standard M&M and the candy coating is a little thicker. The Best New Snack Food I Just Learned About--Someone at work brought in these blue potato chips that are apparently something like eight billion dollars a bag. But they are so good. Thick and potato-y without being too cardboard-like and not too much salt. Men The Best Man to Take to Lunch on Short Notice--Huck. The man knows everything about everything. At our last lunch, he told me so much about all the secret societies he belongs to that I thought I would have to be "disappeared". The Best Man to Have Show Up to Lunch with No Notice--Jesus. Still, I always wonder how these folks know that it's Jesus and not, say, John the Baptist. Women Best Asinine Comment Made Today--Connie Chung. "He's a quiet Chinese man. I can say that because I'm Chinese." What the fuck? It's a news story. Is there really anyone who believes that reporters can only note the ethnicity of the subjects of news stories if they share that ethnicity? Best Asshole Comment Brought to My Attention Today by Bill Hobbs--Marsha Blackburn: "We Tennesseans really are a bunch of God-fearing, freedom-loving, flag-waving, guitar-picking, country music-singing, NASCAR fans and we believe that if 10% is good enough for God, then it is for damn sure good enough for the government." The good thing about Blackburn is that her idiocy is so apparent I don't even have to come up with anything snarky to say.