Tuesday, August 30, 2005

Warning, Cheap Shot

Ah, Kansas, working hard to make sure its child brides get themselves a good edumacation. Obviously, if God hadn't wanted twelve year old girls to be able to marry, He wouldn't have designed it so they could have babies. Nebraska's Attorney General must be some kind of godless communist heathen for prosecuting a twenty-two year old man for the rape of his fourteen year old wife. Clearly, it's not child molestation if Kansas will let him marry her. Really, it's brilliant. I'm going to go to the grocery store right after work and just start grazing through the produce section, because, by God, food is made for eating and girls are made for fucking, laws be damned. Shit, I have half a mind to drive to Kansas and marry me a 12 year old boy. Too bad gas is so damn expensive.

5 Comments:

Blogger Mystery Girl said...

Hey, they are VERY concerned with education in Kansas! In 9th grade Kansas History, for example, I learned that a Jayhawk is NOT a bird (despite what Kansas University claims) but a name for someone who lynched slave owners in Missouri. Even got extra credit for this little factoid in college (in Alabama, where I was corrected that it is not the Civil War, but the War of Northern Aggression, dammit!). Gotta love those regional differences!!

8/30/2005 03:08:00 PM  
Blogger Mixolidian said...

I guess this would be the Kansas-Nebraska Sex Act, eh? :-)>

8/30/2005 03:37:00 PM  
Anonymous Sarcastro said...

If you get a blow-job from your 14 yr old bride, is it called The Great Compromise?

8/30/2005 04:05:00 PM  
Blogger Aunt B said...

That is hilarious.

Hmm. Except I think if I get a blowjob from my 14 year old wife, I've been misrepresenting myself to y'all. Or I'm having some kind of hormone crisis...

8/30/2005 04:13:00 PM  
Blogger Owen said...

or live in a place like canada, where you could have a wife, just not a fourteen year old one. speaking of which, a judge in BC ruled that having an affair with a person the same sex as you now counts as adultery in common law marriages.

8/31/2005 05:56:00 PM  

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