Sunday, August 14, 2005
About Me
- Name: Aunt B
- Location: Nashville, Tennessee, United States
Like Donnell Alexander says, "It's about completing the task of living with enough spontaneity to splurge some of it on bystanders, to share with others working through their own travails a little of your bonus life." But, it's mostly the kind of place that folks looking for "girls and cars" stumble across by accident.
I'VE MOVED. COME CHECK OUT THE MOST RECENT STUFF HERE.
WHERE TO DIRECT YOUR HATE MAIL AND LOVE LETTERS
ALL PROCEEDS GO TO BEER
THINGS I SAID RECENTLY
- A Fairy Tale for Me
- The Hollywood Hustler
- Pondering Hobbies, the Unofficial Sixth Beatle & O...
- ID--The Remix
- Literacy is the Path to Communism
- Who Benefits from Intelligent Design?
- We won! Too bad there's no party.
- The Smell
- Who the Hell is Shaun Groves?
- What about blogs?
THE CAST OF CHARACTERS
Aunt B.--Your kind host.The Butcher--My youngest brother, who lives with me and works as, you guessed it, a butcher. He knows everyone in town.
The Recalcitrant Brother--Our middle brother, who lives in rural Georgia and has a kind of movie star life, if that movie star is Burt Reynolds in Deliverance.
The Reverend--Our Dad, a Methodist minister, perpetually three years from retirement.
Mom--Our Mom. She doesn't get a funny nickname because our mom will not stand for funny nicknames.
Mrs. Wigglebottom--My dog. She's got terrible manners.
The Corporate Shill--Or The Shill, as we call her. My friend from college who was constantly getting me into trouble and going to parties she neglected to tell me about where cute boys would ask her "Where's Aunt B.?"
The Legal Eagle--The Shill's husband.
The Super Genius--She lived next door to me my freshman year of college and we've been friends ever since my first day on the floor.
Miss J.--My first adult friend, meaning the first lasting friendship I made after college. She was my roommate in grad school.
Her Lover--Her Husband.
The Divine Ms. B.--Miss J.'s sister and one of my heroes, because she's brave and funny and mystic and fearless.
JR--My oldest friend. I've known her since I was in the second grade.
Elias--JR's husband and the person who's musical tastes have most strongly affected my own. Oh, how I long to be cooler than him!
The Professor--My closest friend here in Nashville. She's a genius, but she'll never tell you that.
The Man from GM--I've known him since I was 16 and he still hasn't forgiven me for telling him I was a vegetarian when I wasn't.
The Redheaded Kid--No one knows where he comes from or where he goes when he leaves here. I assume he's the Butcher's friend. The Butcher assumes he's mine.
4 Comments:
It's always been my philosophy that so long as it's consensual, you do what you want. That said, ewww....
W
Yeah, well you know all that penis enlargement spam you get? I have no figures for this, but I would assume that way more people buy that shit than you would imagine. Welcome to the United States of Insecurity, where men and women of all backgrounds and classes get the opportunity to do unnatural things to their unfortunately imperfect private parts. God bless it.
Yeah, and I would love to know how something gets codified as "normal." I mean, if there's some place where we're all lining up and checking out each other's nether regions in order to scientifically prove what normal is, I missed it.
Is it really just that we all want to look like porn stars?
Thanks for the compliment, B! I'm still having trouble articulating how bizarre I find this procedure to be, and how strange it seems that women would choose to have a part hacked up that is rarely seen, comparatively. Of course, that assumes that the point of cosmetic surgery is to please an other, which makes it more complex. How many women would feel unacceptably asymmetrical if it weren't for the marketing of this procedure, though? ARgh.
Post a Comment
<< Home