Monday, October 31, 2005

I Reject Constructive Criticism

So, this weekend both the Professor and the Butcher told me I was too judgmental, that I am unforgiving of the ways in which the people around me aren't perfect. The Professor even threatened to beat me up about it. And since, unlike me, the Professor doesn't go around letting her mouth write checks her ass can't cash, I think she's serious. I'm kind of shook by it, I've got to tell you. Especially because, when I thought about it this morning on my walk with the dog, I came up with a lot of good reasons why I'm that way, but no good arguments that I wasn't. The Butcher says, "I just don't know why you care. It doesn't affect you. Can't you tell when things don't affect you?" No, jackass, I can't. See, that's what I mean! Right there. The Butcher is offering me constructive criticism and I'm getting angry and defensive. Anyway, this should probably go some place meaningful, but I've got nothing. If the two people you're closest to in the world tell you that you've got to do things differently, then you've probably got to do things differently. We'll see how it goes.


Anonymous Sarcastro said...

Per your email about scantily clad coworkers, perhaps people aren't judgemental enough.

10/31/2005 08:43:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"letting her mouth write checks her ass can't cash"

Oh my God...that is the only place this entry needs to go because that is my awesome new expression for the week.

Isn't there a version of that line in Top gun?


10/31/2005 08:46:00 AM  
Blogger Aunt B said...

Yeah, I really did want to say something like, "really, judgmental? Like the judgmental way I have LET YOU USE MY FUCKING CAR FOR THE PAST THREE MONTHS because you couldn't bother to pay your insurance and yours got repossessed and now I have to arm myself so that I can get home from work safely?" but I've got nothing like that to hold over the Professor's head, so Occum's razor and all, if it's either that everyone else you know has a problem or you have a problem, it's probably you.

Still, I've got no idea how one walks a line between being less judgmental and too passive.

10/31/2005 08:50:00 AM  
Blogger Aunt B said...


I've never seen Top Gun.

10/31/2005 08:51:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Huh? Are you lying, woman?

I thought we had a long discussion about the subtexts of it one time. And I thought it was mandatory viewing for anyone in junior high when we were.

The car argument is great. I am sufficiently judgmental that I would have used it.


10/31/2005 09:19:00 AM  
Blogger Aunt B said...

SG, I'm so full of shit that we very well could have had such a conversation without me actually having seen that movie. Which, yes, was required viewing, but I never did get the whole Tom Cruise thing, even back when he was young and sane.

10/31/2005 09:29:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

It was also the same night that we were planning our porn empire, so who knows what all we touched on. :)


10/31/2005 10:36:00 AM  
Blogger Peggasus said...

I'm such a hardhead that even if someone would say something like that to me, I'd still think they were wrong.

Only one person ever does, but what does he know anyway?

I knew there was a reason I liked you. You're just like me.

10/31/2005 02:12:00 PM  
Blogger the Professor said...

First, watching Top Gun was not about Tom Cruise but about Val Kilmer; okay, watching Tom Cruise's and Kelly McGillis' tongues tangling in a silouette was an important part of my development, but I'd much rather it have been Val Kilmer and anyone.

Second, I was quite relieved to hear that you have nothing to hold over me.

Third, it's not that you are too judgmental; it's that you let those judgments be reasons to end any kind of relationship with others. Your judgments are usually quite right, but they are not always reasons to not befriend someone.

And fourth, I sure as fuck hope that I do in fact not let my mouth write checks my ass can't cash. Thanks.

10/31/2005 02:33:00 PM  

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