Friday, October 28, 2005

The Big Nashville Blogger Meet-Up

There's this joke going around that now at least ten people have either told me or forwarded me, because they think I'll find it funny. It goes something like this:

One of Bush's aids is briefing him on the events of the last twenty-four hours and he's going down the list of casualties and he said, "...and, Sir, four Brazilian soldiers were also killed." And, startlingly, the President starts to cry. The aid is kind of taken aback, but goes over to comfort him. The President looks up at him woefully and asks "My god, how many is a brazilian?"

Which, I guess, is funny. Unless you're the girl trying to come up with two dollars in change to pay her bar tab who finally has to be like, "Well, fuck, that looks like a dollar, but I'd better have Sarcastro count it." Already, I owe Sarcastro approximately eleventy-seven dollars, or whatever that equals in U.S. money. And, at this rate, by tomorrow, I'll owe him eleventy-eight. I don't find jokes about unfamiliarity with numbers funny, because they hit too close to home.

Anyway, there was another big blogger meetup last night and I went and had an awesome time. Paul Chenoweth is very cool to talk to and I got to hear all about his plans for taking over the world, one computer literate teacher at a time.

That Monroe dude from The Monroe Doctrine had the funniest line of the night when, upon realizing who I was, blurted out, basically "My god, you don't seem like misguided psycho bitch,"* and then got all embarrassed and apologized profusely.

Blake and I talked a little bit about having a blogger meet-up involving guns. Blake seems to think this would be a good idea, even though I will be there.

And, there's a guy in Nashville with an ultimate fighting blog and he was so nice and answered all of my questions about ultimate fighting and, I think, he's a dude that could teach a girl how to kick someone in the face. So, that's cool. I'm going to have to track down his blog and link to it, the next time I do a big update.

Bob Krumm was there briefly and, my god, he's hot in a kind of Republicanny way. Bob, redo your blog photo. Don't rest solely on your conservative ideas; rise to power on the strength of your personal charm and good looks. It worked for Clinton. But you've got to start with a blog photo that conveys said assets.

Mr. Roboto was our host, I think**. At least, he was doing all of the host-y things. Perhaps, Mr. Krumm, you need to keep Mr. Roboto in your back pocket to organize all your political gatherings, because, as a host as well as a person, Roboto rocks.

Brittney was there and looking very birthday girly, as well as Tim Morgan--the man responsible for identifying my remains, should I die while walking the dog and wearing his t-shirt.

Chris and Amanda were there and I told them that, should group marriage ever become legal, they are my first choice for spouses... spouse-couple... whatever the term will be.

I got to meet Pink Kitty, who looked familiar, but I forgot to ask her if we knew each other in some other life. And I was a little star-struck by meeting the famous Busy Mom.

And the Rug Designer was there, with her husband. I really regret not talking to her more. She and her husband came in the room like Hera and Zeus*** all regal and self-possessed. I have made a mental note to invite the Rug Designer to lunch and now, I'm making a real note, right here.

But the most awesome surprise of the evening was that Huck was there! And he was nice and funny and smart and, unlike almost every other guy in the room, not conservative and not a little put out with me for lumping them in with true fucktards. Hurray for Huck. I also got to meet his wife and his... three? eight? ... some amount of sleeping children.

So, everyone else was nice and charming and fun and I love them all, in a purely blogtonic way.

How was I?

Me: Sarcastro, I'm totally going to fight you.

Sarcastro: You'll lose.

Me: Well, duh, I don't care. I'm totally going to fight you.

Sarcastro: Great. If I win, I look like a jackass for beating up a girl. If I lose, I look like a pussy.

Me: I'm just a genius that way.

Some random Nashville blogger: Hi, I'm so and so.

Me: I'm totally going to fight Sarcastro.

Some random Nashville blogger: Not Roger Abramson?

Me: Oh, yeah, him too.

Sarcastro, from across the room: My god, woman, are you still talking about fighting me?

So, you know, I was my same old self--amusing to me, probably not so much to the rest of the world.

[Edited to add: Hey, Sarcastro has pictures! Go check his site for the illustrated version of the night's events.]

*This was not it exactly, obviously, but along those lines.

** Isn't that how it worked? Roboto was the host and Rex Hammock was the bankroll? I think so, and so, I say, thanks to both of you.

*** Well, you know, if Hera and Zeus got along.


Anonymous Sarcastro said...

Damn, I didn't even know Busy Mom was there. For all the financial advice (change counting) I provided last night, you could have at LEAST told me who was in attendance, instead of trying my patience all night. I caught a glimpse of BKrumm as he was herding the kids out the door, another missed opportunity thanks to you.

10/28/2005 08:54:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

So did you guys fight or not?

10/28/2005 09:14:00 AM  
Blogger Aunt B said...

No, we didn't actually fight. Thank god, because dude could kick my ass.


Without breaking a sweat.

S., how the fuck did you miss these people? I met both Krumm and Busy Mom when you were not ten feet away.

Perhaps, rather than gloating about your superior counting skills to smantix, you should have been standing in awe of my wonderfulness. If you had been properly worshipping me, you would have noticed all the folks I was meeting and they, in return, would have met you.

10/28/2005 09:25:00 AM  
Blogger John H said...

It was blog-honorific to meet you and Sarcastro last night. I'm sorry I had to leave early before B.Krumm and Huck appeared.

10/28/2005 09:31:00 AM  
Anonymous Sarcastro said...

Sure, I had my hands full with my adoring public asking for autographs, requesting quips, bon mots and amusing anecdotes to tell their friends, posing for photos, etc. So, maybe I didn't have my attention focused on what you were doing every second. But the least you could have done is tap me on the shoulder and say "Have you met Busy Krumm?" Or whoever. Would that have been so hard?

Although, I didn't want to be interrupted during the Smantix/Amanda throwdown.

10/28/2005 09:34:00 AM  
Blogger Busy Mom said...

I was kinda trapped on the window side of the tables. Nearly caused my bladder to burst as I couldn't get out to go to the bathroom or to talk to people at the other end of the table. I really wanted to talk with you guys!

OK, back to pacing like a caged animal because my site is down.

10/28/2005 09:42:00 AM  
Blogger rugdesigner said...

I am so excited about lunch! You are so funny with the regal and self-possessed stuff. You'll find out soon enough... Zeus I was pretty impressed with (as I truly am with my version anyway). I admit to having to look up Hera though. I could so totally see me holding a stiff cuckoo to my breast to warm it. ;-)

I'm so happy to have finally met you!

10/28/2005 10:03:00 AM  
Blogger Ivy, the Great and Powerful said...

Ah, sucks that I missed it! I think every time there's been a blogger meet-up my car's been in the shop. Of course, my car's been spending more time in the shop than out, that might have something to do with it. Well, there's always next time!

10/28/2005 10:23:00 AM  
Anonymous mrroboto said...

The ultimate fighting guy is Bruce Leroy (Get it? "Bruce Lee"). He's a cool guy, and one of the gents lucky enough to meet an attractive non-blogging female at the last party. We linked him out of pure fear after meeting him at the Jackson's party in March.

Thanks for coming, and I'm glad you had a good time. Again, thanks for more nice words about ME (why else would I host these parties?). And, yes, I was the host; Rex was the paying sponsor.

People seemed to be up for another of these, maybe an early Decemeber get-together. What do you guys think?

10/28/2005 10:31:00 AM  
Blogger HUCK said...

It sucked getting there so late that I missed so many of the folks I wanted to meet.

...but it did have some advantages.
I did get to witness the Smantix vs Amanda smackdown.

Best of all though is the fact that when you do show up late to a party in a bar, everyone else already has their beer googles firmly in place. - Thanks for the compliments, Aunt B...

Had a great time, though. I wish I could've gotten to talk to Chris Longer and John H. at all. Still, I had a blast yuk'n it up with Sar and B. What a couple of freaks those two are. Exactly my brand o' people.

10/28/2005 10:38:00 AM  
Blogger John H said...

Thanks to Mr. Roboto also..

I hope that a December get-together can be arranged.

Is there any way we can kidnap Katherine and make her come to the next one?

10/28/2005 10:38:00 AM  
Blogger Pink Kitty said...

Aunt B, I don't think we've met before but seeing how we are on the same campus, it is entirely possible we've seen each other before.

We need a Vandybloggers meet-up thing.

10/28/2005 10:39:00 AM  
Blogger HUCK said...

I'm up for another round... anytime.

10/28/2005 10:41:00 AM  
Blogger Kat Coble said...

I hate that I missed it, and now I get an email from Sarcastro telling me that my brokeness wouldn't have been much of an issue. So now, I weep.

Anyrate, it sounds like fun--all except the Smantix/Amanda smackdown.

10/28/2005 11:14:00 AM  
Blogger Aunt B said...

Shh, Pink Kitty. I'm supposed to be anonymous. Let's just say "Nashville Private College."

Something in December before the holiday stuff gets into full swing would be great.

Ivy, you could have totally brought the Lexus...

S., next time I'll be sure to bring some walkie talkies so that the minute I meed someone, I can get ahold of you and let you know.

10/28/2005 11:15:00 AM  
Blogger Aunt B said...

Shoot, what am I saying? You probably have some left over from your military days.

You bring 'em. I'll use 'em.

10/28/2005 11:16:00 AM  
Anonymous Amanda said...

I vow, here and now on this blog, that Chris and I will never get married unless we can enter into some sort of freaky deaky 3 way deal with Aunt B.

Also there was no smackdown! It was a friendly coversation where the first thing I happened to say was 'you're crazy'. Nothin' wrong with that....

10/28/2005 12:02:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

So how many ears did you sweetly whisper 'fuck' in?

What's this about a showdown?

10/28/2005 12:04:00 PM  
Blogger HUCK said...

Awww... Amanda? Where's the fun in that.

Party pooper...

10/28/2005 12:21:00 PM  
Blogger Aunt B said...

W., I got to whisper fuck in no one's ear. That was very sad. Fritz never showed up and without him to start things off with, I just wasn't in the mood.

As for the fight, Amanda is just racking up the smack-downs. First Kleinheider and now Smantix.

Maybe in December we can have a wrestling ring and Amanda can take on all comers.

10/28/2005 01:01:00 PM  
Anonymous Bob K said...

Hot? Now you've put me in a bind. If I put up another photo, people will know that your hot assessment came about only because (a) it was dark, and (b) I didn't get there until late enough that you saw me about the time of your third or fourth round of the evening.

People are going to be so disappointed when they learn the truth.

10/28/2005 01:12:00 PM  
Blogger Paul Chenoweth said...

Aunt B., it was fun and I am glad we were able to chat. Then Nashville Private University group meets on Thursday afternoon in a 'classroom' (wink, wink) at Dan McGuinness, just so we can make fun of the naked statues.

10/28/2005 01:33:00 PM  
Blogger Mr. Roboto said...

At the BlogNashville party, Amanda confronted me about the big boobs that used to adorn the top of TNF. We took them down the following week.

10/28/2005 01:48:00 PM  
Anonymous Amanda said...

What can I say? I'm an angry drunk!

10/28/2005 02:55:00 PM  
Blogger Kleinheider said...

Amanda is just racking up the smack-downs. First Kleinheider..

Excuse you, B. That was a misunderstanding. The Kleinheider doesn't get smacked down. I think we all know this :)

10/28/2005 03:16:00 PM  
Blogger Bruceleeroy said...

If you are going to fight sarcastro do it in February. I should have enough time to teach you how to kick him in the face by that time. Or maybe I'll teach you the triangle you were asking about. If that doesn't work my prices are fairly cheap and we can get the job done. Even though I like sarcastro I can be bought.

Mr Roboto, it's actually Bruceleeroy. There is a Bruce Lee tie, but I am named after the last dragon. So get it right, or I will hunt you down like the dog that you are!

10/28/2005 06:07:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hate that I missed it.


10/29/2005 11:13:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Love the nick BruceLeroy. That was an awesome movie shonuff. Who's the master?

10/29/2005 02:44:00 PM  
Anonymous Sarcastro said...

Bring it on!

I haven't been beaten up by a girl since the fourth grade. Right after she and I split a Schlitz beer. She was a mean drunk, that one.

10/31/2005 07:21:00 AM  
Blogger Aunt B said...

And mess up that pretty face?

That doesn't seem fair to humanity.

10/31/2005 08:20:00 AM  
Anonymous Sarcastro said...

The half-drunk fourth grader put a welt the size of a grapefruit on my eye.

So no shots to the eyes and no pepper spray.

10/31/2005 08:43:00 AM  

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