Progressive Men, Are You on Our Side or Not?

Let's just go back to the Maggart thing here a second, because I'm still pissed off about it and yet... See, here's the thing, Progressive Men--I'd like to feel like we are all working towards the same goals. Let's broadly sum up those goals as "social justice for all through the excessive taxation of everyone we consider richer than us (oh, and more conservative than us, regardless of wealth)." And sometimes stuff happens, like Maggart revealing herself for the skeevy bigot she is and progressives on the internet rallying against her. And, honestly, I guess I feel some desire to be a part of that. I want to point out how stupid she is and laugh at her with all the cool kids. But... Okay, once Katherine Coble accused me of always taking women's sides in debates. I can't find where to link to it, but, as is my way, I've pondered that for a long time and, honestly, I think it's a fair accusation. I'm not sure I hold women up to the same scrutiny I hold men up to. And, reading this post and the comments on Maggart that follow it really clarified for me why I really don't like to criticize women. It's not that I think that women are so much better than men, it's that I hate how, whenever you criticize women, it quickly degrades into shit a woman can't defend herself against. I mean, you want to call Maggart a despicable homophobe? Fine, because she can either defend herself against that accusation or accept the criticism or whatever. And calling Maggart a despicable homophobe is an accusation that only reflects on her and her accuser. But look at what's going on over at Wayne Besen's. Here he's characterizing Focus on the Family as a hate group, which I might agree with, in theory and says of Maggart, "It is sad that some people will do and say anything to maintain a belief system that is rotten to the core." Then come the comments that prompted me to write this all in the first place--"this cunt is homophobic" & "This bitch is a fucking lunatic!" Progressive men, this annoys the shit out of me when it comes to y'all, that this is how you talk about women who piss you off, that we're cunts and bitches. I mean, we're right here. We read what you write. You want us on your side and yet, you toss around bitch and cunt like that's a fair way to fight. How are we supposed to defend ourselves against that? Do you not get that I have a cunt? It's right down there and it's not something terrible. To have a cunt is not a curse. How dare you take my good things and throw them in my face. "Oh, but B., we call men dicks, too. It's equal opportunity degradation of associating people with their sex organs." Oh, really? If I call, say, Bill O'Reilly a dick, how uncomfortable does that make the rest of you men? "Oh, but B.," you say, "Maggart being a cunt has nothing to do with you. She is a cunt. You're not." To which I say, do you live in America? Do you not get how "cunt" sounds like a threat? You say it about one woman and every woman within hearing range gets that you'll use that word against her if the opportunity arises. And we don't want that. Let me explain it to you. When someone calls a woman a cunt, what he or she means is that that woman needs to be taken down a peg or two. AND it sounds like a suggestion for just how that woman could be taken down a peg or two--just make sure she knows that all she is is her cunt. And I think we all know the easiest way to reduce an uppity woman to her cunt. God, do you see why I hate seeing "cunt" come up in political discussions? It sounds like an endorsement of the worst kind of violence against women. And to see progressive men using "cunt" to describe a woman, even a woman I disagree with, and going uncalled on it really pisses me off. Because y'all are supposed to be on the side of women, at least to some extent, at least enough on our side to not think that using our bodies as an insult is okay.