Monday, December 12, 2005
About Me
- Name: Aunt B
- Location: Nashville, Tennessee, United States
Like Donnell Alexander says, "It's about completing the task of living with enough spontaneity to splurge some of it on bystanders, to share with others working through their own travails a little of your bonus life." But, it's mostly the kind of place that folks looking for "girls and cars" stumble across by accident.
I'VE MOVED. COME CHECK OUT THE MOST RECENT STUFF HERE.
WHERE TO DIRECT YOUR HATE MAIL AND LOVE LETTERS
ALL PROCEEDS GO TO BEER
THINGS I SAID RECENTLY
- Hours of Emotional and Mental Preparation?
- Dad Wants to Talk about the Men in my Life
- You Might Not Be a Redneck
- Oops, I hope you didn't go outside on my recommend...
- Simple Questions
- Why I Will Not Be Answering My Phone Today
- I Scandalize my Co-Workers
- My Heart is Already on the Weekend
THE CAST OF CHARACTERS
Aunt B.--Your kind host.The Butcher--My youngest brother, who lives with me and works as, you guessed it, a butcher. He knows everyone in town.
The Recalcitrant Brother--Our middle brother, who lives in rural Georgia and has a kind of movie star life, if that movie star is Burt Reynolds in Deliverance.
The Reverend--Our Dad, a Methodist minister, perpetually three years from retirement.
Mom--Our Mom. She doesn't get a funny nickname because our mom will not stand for funny nicknames.
Mrs. Wigglebottom--My dog. She's got terrible manners.
The Corporate Shill--Or The Shill, as we call her. My friend from college who was constantly getting me into trouble and going to parties she neglected to tell me about where cute boys would ask her "Where's Aunt B.?"
The Legal Eagle--The Shill's husband.
The Super Genius--She lived next door to me my freshman year of college and we've been friends ever since my first day on the floor.
Miss J.--My first adult friend, meaning the first lasting friendship I made after college. She was my roommate in grad school.
Her Lover--Her Husband.
The Divine Ms. B.--Miss J.'s sister and one of my heroes, because she's brave and funny and mystic and fearless.
JR--My oldest friend. I've known her since I was in the second grade.
Elias--JR's husband and the person who's musical tastes have most strongly affected my own. Oh, how I long to be cooler than him!
The Professor--My closest friend here in Nashville. She's a genius, but she'll never tell you that.
The Man from GM--I've known him since I was 16 and he still hasn't forgiven me for telling him I was a vegetarian when I wasn't.
The Redheaded Kid--No one knows where he comes from or where he goes when he leaves here. I assume he's the Butcher's friend. The Butcher assumes he's mine.
2 Comments:
I did that once. Just got into the car and commenced to drive until there was no road, then listened to the ocean roll for an entire day with nothing to break it up but the squawk of gulls. The locals aren't as curious as you might think they'd be.
And then I got cold. My butt got frozen and the view from the car wasn't as dramatic. I smelled kind of funky and sad. Then I got hungry and I wanted soup, so I chose life and it smelled like hot bread.
The world doesn't end. In my case, no one really missed me or noticed that I'd taken a hiatus, which was probably the reason I felt the urge to flee. It's not a bad impulse to act on when one needs to get one's head back on straight.
Once on an impulse, I drove to Macon, GA to tell the woman I was in love with that I got a job. She didn't know about either the unrequited love or the job. She wasn't at home, so I used the powers of deductive reasoning (sold seperately) to find her in the law library. She seemed shocked at my unannounced arrival and instructed one of her study partners to look up 'restraining orders'.
I drove back to Atlanta a little wiser and smarter than when I left. I wonder what happened to her and that job that I wound up not taking.
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