Monday, December 19, 2005
About Me
- Name: Aunt B
- Location: Nashville, Tennessee, United States
Like Donnell Alexander says, "It's about completing the task of living with enough spontaneity to splurge some of it on bystanders, to share with others working through their own travails a little of your bonus life." But, it's mostly the kind of place that folks looking for "girls and cars" stumble across by accident.
I'VE MOVED. COME CHECK OUT THE MOST RECENT STUFF HERE.
WHERE TO DIRECT YOUR HATE MAIL AND LOVE LETTERS
ALL PROCEEDS GO TO BEER
THINGS I SAID RECENTLY
- Dr. Phil & Recent Comments
- Fighting a Pit Bull
- The Return of the Man from GM
- Three Cheers for Days with Cars
- Precious Sleep
- We've Left 'Outrageous' and Entered 'Unrecognizable'
- Universal Salvation
- Walmart, How I Hate You
- To My Gentlemen Readers
- Lunch with Brittney
THE CAST OF CHARACTERS
Aunt B.--Your kind host.The Butcher--My youngest brother, who lives with me and works as, you guessed it, a butcher. He knows everyone in town.
The Recalcitrant Brother--Our middle brother, who lives in rural Georgia and has a kind of movie star life, if that movie star is Burt Reynolds in Deliverance.
The Reverend--Our Dad, a Methodist minister, perpetually three years from retirement.
Mom--Our Mom. She doesn't get a funny nickname because our mom will not stand for funny nicknames.
Mrs. Wigglebottom--My dog. She's got terrible manners.
The Corporate Shill--Or The Shill, as we call her. My friend from college who was constantly getting me into trouble and going to parties she neglected to tell me about where cute boys would ask her "Where's Aunt B.?"
The Legal Eagle--The Shill's husband.
The Super Genius--She lived next door to me my freshman year of college and we've been friends ever since my first day on the floor.
Miss J.--My first adult friend, meaning the first lasting friendship I made after college. She was my roommate in grad school.
Her Lover--Her Husband.
The Divine Ms. B.--Miss J.'s sister and one of my heroes, because she's brave and funny and mystic and fearless.
JR--My oldest friend. I've known her since I was in the second grade.
Elias--JR's husband and the person who's musical tastes have most strongly affected my own. Oh, how I long to be cooler than him!
The Professor--My closest friend here in Nashville. She's a genius, but she'll never tell you that.
The Man from GM--I've known him since I was 16 and he still hasn't forgiven me for telling him I was a vegetarian when I wasn't.
The Redheaded Kid--No one knows where he comes from or where he goes when he leaves here. I assume he's the Butcher's friend. The Butcher assumes he's mine.
14 Comments:
I'm not sure that sarcastro and I will share a lot of the same opinions, but I'm with him on this one. I loved this movie. During some of the action sequences I was laughing and clapping with glee, like a kid on a roller coaster. It was so much fun!
Miss J
I haven't seen Kong yet. I don't know if I will. The idea has never appealed to me, frankly. I am probably missing the gene that makes "Kong" seem interesting.
I refuse to watch movies I know will make me cry, so King Kong is right off my list of possibilities.
But it looks good.
He's pretty hairy.
Damn shame that's not true of me;
At least on my head.
Oh, my beautiful sister. Can it be true? You actually enjoyed this film? I spoke with our father yesterday and he said he and mom were thinking of going to see it. I said, "I saw it last night. It sucks. Don't see it." He said, "How interesting, I just spoke with Miss J and she said she loved it." I said, "Surely this is not so for I respect and admire my sister's opinion. Surely this is not so." But apparently it is. We must talk. I fell asleep. I have never EVER fallen asleep in a movie theatre before. Ever.
I challenge ANYONE to find a moment in that film where Naomi Watt's mouth is not agape (pun intended). She had the exact same expression on her face for the entire film. Pensive, full of wonder and confusion and admiration. Mouth open. Two front teeth visible. Eyebrow crinkle. Could we get some variety there, Naomi?
And Jimmy? Who gives a fuck about Jimmy?! And why must everyone say Jimmy's name when speaking to him?! And the Heart of Darkness reference? We get it, Peter. You don't have to show it a billion times. We get it.
-The Divine Ms. B
I would have cried, but I can't spare the moisture.
The "Jimmy" subplot could have been done away with. Character development of the "red-shirted crewmembers" was unnecessary.
Kitty, are you going to tell me that you are fine with the walking talking trees and boring exposition of LOTR, but draw the line at giant ape?
If anything go to marvel at the digital recreation of Depression-era NYC. That alone is worth six bucks.
It's not the ape that gets me. In fact, I'm a big fan of monkeys, with 5 on my desk and a life size one in the spare bedroom--which sounds kinkier than it really is.
The story has flat out never appealed to me. Why?
1. I first saw the stupid version with Jessica Lange. It was a bad, horrible, nogood, awful piece of dung.
2. You KNOW that Kong dies in the end. I don't want to spend chunks of my time growing attached to someone I know is doomed. I already have dogs and a husband that will all die. That thought sickens me. Why pay someone to rub my nose in the fleetingness of loving animals?!?
3. When I was a little kid these friends of mine had a poster with Kong on top of the Empire State building swatting at the planes. That poster scared and confused me. To this day, the idea of the movie scares and confuses me.
4. If I hear that "Lo, the beast...." poetry thing one more time, I'll stab someone in the ear. I'm not beautiful. I'm nice enough looking, but I just know in my heart of hearts that the monkey would take one look at my average-looking but well padded ass and say "huh. appetizers." I'd be gone. I fail to feel sorry for a monkey who won't eat a woman just cause she looks good. The monkey is symbolic of all the assholes in the world who don't date "nice" girls, but only want to objectify the pretty ones.
5. What the hell is the point of the monkey being in love with the woman? She can't have sex with him. He could maybe use her to pick his nose, but that's it.
6. Jack Black's character seems annoying in the previews. Jack Black is someone well suited for exactly one roll. That of Jack Black. Watching him play NotJackBlack holds no appeal for me.
I have loved Peter Jackson since his much underappreciated The Frighteners and I feel like I owe him attendence to this movie. But I just can't bring myself to go. I know I lose major geek points. But there it is.
The monkey is symbolic of all the assholes in the world who don't date "nice" girls, but only want to objectify the pretty ones.
I thought he was symbolic of the Mandingo and this was all a racist movie.
Anyways, that's the talk around Atlanta.
Well, duh. Obviously.
So what this is really about is Kitty hates Negroes.
I don't wouldn't say she hates our mahogany brethren, but it seems that she's been rejected by quite a few of them.
Play nice, boys.
That's me. The big racist. ;=p
Divine Ms. B, if you went to see this movie for the acting, then you are a strange attender of Peter Jackson films. The movie could definitely use an editor. I totally agree that the "Jimmy" plot line was ridiculous and unnecessary and the Heart of Darkness references gratuitous and silly. To me, however, it was all worth it to see the dinosaur stampede and King Kong fighting T-Rexes in the vines. That was some of the coolest stuff I've seen at the movies. It's all about wonder. And I don't feel that very much at the movies anymore.
Miss J
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