Friday, September 30, 2005
Not that You Asked Me
Egad, Bill Bennett is a Moron. Obviously, We Need to Talk Seriously about Aborting Males
Things that I Didn't Do at Dinner with the Libertarian Elite
Thursday, September 29, 2005
Back from Lunch Early
Why the Butcher's Getting Searched at the Airport
Wednesday, September 28, 2005
Google, Don't be that way
"This disgusting trade in human misery"
Yes, I am a broken record
Tuesday, September 27, 2005
A blog like any other
Monday, September 26, 2005
In Defense of Kate Moss
Sunday, September 25, 2005
Renewed Sense of Optimism
The Cutie Rule and Other Things
Saturday, September 24, 2005
America, I ask you for very little
Friday, September 23, 2005
The Chopsticks Stop Working
Thursday, September 22, 2005
Wednesday, September 21, 2005
Unbeknownst to Them, the Libertarian Elite about Kills Me
Tuesday, September 20, 2005
Me & me
Monday, September 19, 2005
The Stanley Hotel
Renting a Car
Friday, September 16, 2005
Mrs. Wigglebottom Keeps Watch
What? Are you checking again?
Thursday, September 15, 2005
The Professor Plots Against Me
More Neighborhood Shenanigans
Wednesday, September 14, 2005
Return of "Hermaphrodite Porn"
Well, that answers that question
"Star Trek" and Pedophilia
1. Create a seemingly plausible fake word--like 'televisual.' 2. Make some off-handed reference to Foucault. 3. Use either "hegemony" or "praxis" or both, if you can. 4. Reference some dead guy most people have heard of--usually Aristotle or Nietzsche.
Now, combine those elements into a sentence:"In order to overcome the hegemony imposed by the Aristotelian world-view, it's necessary to create a new, more Foucaltvian praxis more in line with our televisual age." You throw shit like that around, you'll be standing in front of undergraduate classes in short order and working your way into grad students' pants in no time. Note: it's not necessary to even know what 'hegemony' or 'praxis' means. I don't know what they mean. I have to keep calling the Professor and reading sentences out loud to her to make sure they actually make sense, and they still let me use them.
Nashville's Hobo Villages--An Investigative Report
Tuesday, September 13, 2005
Paul Chenoweth is Looking Out For You, Dear Reader
Monday, September 12, 2005
Like Diamonds, Like Ten Thousand Jewels in the Sky
Happy Birthday, Mom!
Even as I'm writing this, I know it marks me as an old woman
Sunday, September 11, 2005
"I Like Peeing on the Wall, Thank You Very Much"
This is For Your Own Good
First the apology
Saturday, September 10, 2005
What Do You Get the Blog That Has Everything?
Holy Shit! (Just wait, it's a profanity and a pun.)
Friday, September 09, 2005
That Was Quick
***In Case You Want Another Chance to Die in an Administration Fuck-Up
National Geographic October 2004
***Yes, It's More Liberal Crap
Ma'am, step away from the ROTC
Thursday, September 08, 2005
Brilliant in Two Places
Rambling on about my Dog
Wednesday, September 07, 2005
"What are you gonna do? You got rules and government everywhere."
In Which Our Hero Pouts and Feels Sorry for Herself
Why It Should Be Me
- I'm not a lawyer, but I know some.
- I'm a woman.
- I'm pro-choice.
- I'm pro-gay marriage.
- I'm pro-First and -Second Amendment.
- I'm pro-Affirmative Action
- I'm pro-Equal Rights
- Conservatives already hate me, so Bush could be seen as throwing a bone to liberals.
- He could also be seen as appeasing his weblogging critics.
- He'd be giving Bill Hobbs a lifetime of blog fodder. Think of all the ways Bill would hate every opinion I rendered.
- I'm young, so a lifetime appointment for me would really be a lifetime appointment. Both my grandmas lived well into their eighties and one is still going strong. So, I've got at least fifty years to give to the Court.
- I'm not very politically active--The Tennessee Democratic Women keep sending me emails and I keep deleting them & I vote, but that's about it--so there wouldn't be a lot of paperwork for the media or Congress to have to sort through.
- Bush needs to do something to throw the restless Republicans for a loop. Nominating me would certainly do that.
- I hate Bush. Nominating me would prove that not everything he does is pandering to the extremists in his party or his friends.
- It'd be great fun to whisper "Oh, I'd love to fuck you up the ass, big boy" to Rick Santorum as I walked by him on my way to my Senate confirmation hearings. And when he turned, outraged, I promise I'd give him a big long, delicious wink and pull the tip of a big rainbow dildo out of my purse and wiggle it at him salaciously.
- The Democrats would love me and the Republicans would have to approve me or face Karl Rove's wrath. No filibuster problem with me!
So, President Bush, nominate me! You could do worse.